The art of listening is one of the most essential yet often overlooked aspects of love. Ogasabi on 9am News Nigeria highlights how good listening can rejuvenate and sustain a loving relationship, while poor listening or neglecting to listen can slowly erode it. Next time you’re out, observe couples around you. You might notice some barely engaging in conversation, instead staring blankly or picking at their food. It’s not that they have nothing to say; they may have simply forgotten how to listen.
You might think you’re a good listener, but in reality, truly the art of listening is a rare skill. While many hear, few actually listen. I’ve personally struggled with this. There have been times when my partner talks, and I’m mentally preoccupied. She’ll sometimes catch on and ask, “Did you hear what I just said?” I can usually parrot back her last few words, but she knows I wasn’t genuinely paying attention. You can imagine how that makes her feel.
Several years ago, a consultant evaluated my leadership skills and bluntly told me, “You stink at listening.” It was a wake-up call. For some, listening comes naturally. For others, like me, it requires conscious effort and practice. Here’s how to improve your listening skills:
- Focus Completely: When someone speaks, stop everything and focus solely on them. Don’t let your mind wander or start formulating your response. Your goal is to understand not just their words, but also their emotions.
- Use All Your Senses: Listen with your ears, but also pay attention with your eyes. Facial expressions, body language, and even breathing patterns can reveal a lot about what the person is feeling.
- Reflect Back: Repeat back what you’ve heard to confirm understanding. For instance, when I tell my partner Amy what I think she meant, it not only ensures I’ve grasped her message but also affirms the importance of her words. This might seem excessive, but it reassures Amy that I care and am truly listening.
In summary, listening is more than just hearing words; it’s about fully engaging with the person speaking. By practicing attentive listening, you can deepen your connections and show your loved ones that you truly care. For more insights, stay tuned to Ogasabi on 9am News Nigeria, your go-to source for relationship advice and more.